Wednesday, December 24, 2008

The Obama Show.

Michelle Obama is Clair Huxtable in real life. The end. Donezo. No explanation needed. 

Plus Barack Obama is totally an upgrade from The Cos. B-town is better looking, even if The Cos had WAY sweeter sweaters. 

And that would mean Michelle and Barack would have to have 3 more children. And two of them would have to be white. 

J/K. But why was Sondra so light?  20 years later and I still can't get over it. 


Monday, December 22, 2008

Kanye Turmoil.

Thinking about Kanye West is really, really tiring. I have as much reason to hate him as I do to love him.  How am I supposed to decide? 

Against:

He can't get over himself.  And then when people criticize him for not being able to get over himself he can't get over the fact that people can't get over him not getting over himself. 

He's a grown ass man and he throws tantrums. Straight up, drawn-out, no-shame having, crying real tears tantrums. That is not OK.

He samples way, way, WAY too much. Who is he trying to be? Puff Daddy?  You are not Mase and this is not "Harlem World". Note: I refuse to acknowledge his name change to "P. Diddy".  Don't be an enabler.  

He REALLY can't get over himself. He uses Louis Vuitton and Jesus Pieces as figurative band-aids for his OBVIOUS and massive insecurities. 

My problems with 808's and Heartbreak alone:

STEP AWAY FROM THE AUTO-TUNE. Using an auto-tune does not "magically" give you the ability to sing nor does it give you the right. Leave the auto-tune to Zapp & Roger and Cher (only in "Believe" because it is pure magic) and while you're at it take that shit away from T-Pain.  Lil' Wayne is allowed because he is my favorite. 

Stop sampling. You've proven yourself capable of creativity without sampling. So why resort to being cheap?

Although I do appreciate your departure from your usual style and the fact that this album is not an extension of "Graduation", you are NOT Andre 3000. Your experimentation with artsy Rn&B, although much more electronic based than "The Love Below", is not nearly as mind blowing as Andre 3000's effort. 

For:

He has really good skin. 

He wears pretty clothes. 

His samples are ridiculously fun. 

808's and Heartbreak is hypnotizing. 

He is a genius. 

What side wins? I'm unsure, but i'm still listening to 808's and I think I might like it. I still want to light his auto-tune on fire though.  Tie?